All Posts, page 28

This is a completely uninspired film that turns into even more of a turd if you’ve ever heard of Apollo Robbins. Am I supposed to care for characters just because they’re good-looking?

Astounding VFX on Kurt Russell’s character, but an otherwise bland sequel that does little to take the characters further.

This one is going in my “Faves Under 90 Minutes” bin. Even though the script isn’t perfect (well, it is about time travel), it nonetheless manages to feel very original, with some iconic moments that I won’t forget anytime soon.

Bong Joon-ho cementing himself as one of my favourite living directors.

Even though this film shows its influences very clearly (Spielberg, Zemeckis, Miyazaki), Bong imbues it with his own brand of weird to deliver an exceptionally surprising and endearing film, with brilliantly fleshed-out characters. Okja hits all the notes it reaches for, and then some.

Beautiful character-focused cinematography, hair-raising tension, confusingly messy editing.

What did this gain by opting for a nonlinear timeline? Certainly not more than it lost. Felt like Nolan trying to make the genre feel new, and failing.

What does this movie even want

This is exactly like The Revenant, except much more focused and actually able to get under my skin at times.

Films with brutally simple plots (not simplistic, mind you) executed well seem to be a rare delight these days. Bonus points: under ninety minutes.

Design by Committee: The Movie

A bit too much of the original’s blunt simplicity is missing here, but it’s still damn good. The mirrors scene is one for the ages.

If you thought characters did stupid shit in Prometheus, wait ‘til you see this one. Ridley Scott is more concerned with establishing capricious moments than he is with putting out a coherent film, it seems.

This is a hopelessly misguided doubling-down on everything Prometheus got wrong, but with that film’s amazing production design and worldbuilding completely removed. Future humans on an interstellar colonization mission are literally still using GoPros.

The classic Alien title sequence is reused, but it’s no longer the opening shot, and it’s sped-up. Instead of yielding an atmosphere of slow-burn creepiness, we get low-attention-span throwback. And that sadly matches up pretty well with what Alien: Covenant feels like.

The creatures are as cool as ever, though.

Don’t let anyone ever tell you that the monsters don’t show up enough in this movie.

The Ligeti-scored skydiving scene and the atomic breath reveal are just as awesome as I remembered them. This stands up as one of the most gripping giant monster movies ever.

This is nothing to write home about, but it’s a solid monster movie. Which is all I was hoping for, really.

The tone is the polar opposite of Gareth Edwards’ Godzilla — it feels fun instead of tense. That in itself is perfectly okay, but I wish it could have kept some of that Jurassic Park-like subtlety that worked so well for Godzilla.

Like a lot of mystery stories, some of the excitement starts to fade as the curtain is pulled back. And then it almost becomes a matter of taste: you may or may not like where it goes. I wasn’t amazed by the destination, but I quite enjoyed the journey on this one.

For an admittedly small film it dares to feel big, and for all its tension it manages to find some serenity. And it does those things without appearing contrived. It feels balanced, distinct, and personal.

This film is the cinematic equivalent of clickbait: begging you to look at it while having nothing to say.

Few films have given me a harder time suspending disbelief. No part of it has any depth. Not the plot, not the dialogue, not the sci-fi, not the romance. And it has the nerve to acknowledge its hollow meaninglessness when that crappy Imagine Dragons song comes on in the end.

I really enjoyed Morten Tyldum’s other films Imitation Game and Headhunters, but this is some lowest-common-denominator garbage. It does look pretty, tho.